'Cause pics are love, and 'cause I look beautiful + happy in them. And 'cause I got a request to see how I look like nowadays -like one could change much, hahaha.

All about yesterday. ^___^ -Should have got a pic with my prize... since I wasn't expecting it, no one took me one while standing embarrassed and shy in the stage. I have stage-fright... who would have thought ^^U





-Seika.

I'm officially in holidays now. -And need to get a goddamned internship shomewhere, soon.

The ceremony was nice, teacher requested to be formally dressed and it seems I was the only one who understood... my classmates were dressed in jeans and t-shirt.

Still, I looked amazing.

I won a prize. -I always knew I deserved it more than the rest of my classmates (conceited me, haha), but I thought I wasn't gonna get it 'cause I wasn't actually finishing my classes (I still have two classes for next year). Still, the guy girl talking on the ceremony said my name and I was as shocked as pleased as embarrased. I was so happy I looked nice and had dressed like teacher requested...

It was a watch. Cool watch, by the way ^^ More than the watch itself, I was happy I won something. My parents were there, so was my brother.  It's weird everyone thinks so high of myself buy me. Someone must be wrong. I hope it's me.

My workshop video was so much better than the one my classmates presented -as always, but I guess I have faith they will get better. I got the best grade of all, all my teachers congratulated me and I felt so happy. I'm still so so happy ^___^

Then I went to drink cocktails with CoolturalFriend2 and my bro. I though my bro would feel out of place at first -he said he wanted to go but at some point he got all shy and said he'd go home. Turns out, he liked my friend a lot and we talked all nice. CoolturalFriend2 was nice to talk him into the dark parts of her life -hoohoo- and my bro was so thrilled about it he asked me how I could have kept her a secret from him -I mean, I talk about her, but not about some things he thought were so important.

It was a nice night, I laughed my ass off and I got a prize. I'm happy.

And I'm off to bed 'cause I'm also sleepy.

¿Por qué las AmigasCultural1 y Cooltural2 siempre tienen razón acerca de mí y mis capacidades?

***

Why CulturalFriend1 and CoolturalFriend2 are always so right about me and my abilities?

Seika's happy ♫

Weekend has had its up and downs, thrilling, I loved it -even the raging moments made me feel some what hyper. And even though I don't think life moves through bitching, I can say is a good stress-relief.

All this facebook situation made me feel excited the whole day. Gosh, I enjoyed writing that answer and I anxiously waited for a reply. I just wanted to know what could she possibly say.

Most people don't realize about this, but I enjoy being mean to others. I somewhat find it amusing, how my brain works. Nothing's really there to 'cause me harm, but I can use words, and I use them well. I'm proud. I try not to be mean to people, but sometimes I can't help it, and I hurt people I don't mean to 'cause I'm somewhat impulsive. Other times, like this one, people deserve it.

Finally, I got no answer regarding, which makes me feel somewhat dissapointed, how a person who can easily blame someone else won't return the message. Even if it was to agree with me -hahaha, that would have been no fun! I don't know if there's a concept for this, but in spanish is something like "throwing the stone and hiding the hand". And I hate it.

In any case, my classmates fucked me up today again -hopefully for the last time, 'cause I'm not working with them again-, although, God loving me and all, dad came to save the day -still doesn't make it any better the fact they screwed me, I can hold grudges.

I finished all my exams -finally- and tomorrow's gonna be partying the whole day!... Well, not all of it, just the part of the day I'm not gonna be sleeping -hahaha. I'm not all so proud of one of the thingies for tomorrow, it could have been better, well, the animation is great, but there's a crappy effect I couldn't get any better and looks like done for a 1st year boy ._.

Still, no sense worrying about it.

I guess I'm off to... procrastinate do nothing! I deserve it. I'm gonna have good x-rated lucid dreams tonight. I wonder who'd be interesting to rape...

-Seika.

Working overnight again. I'm not really sleepy, but I'm guessing exhaustion is gonna hit me soon... and I still have quite a few things to finish.

Fucking renders are taking forever too =____=

I just wish for a day when I can sleep the whole day and not feel guilty 'cause of being procrastinating. I wanna go home and sleep in my comfy bed and be happy.

I've been facebooking a lot too, before actually getting to work. It has given me very good surprises -hehehe. And enjoyable chats, the last one with that kind of x-rated content I so adore. Clever sex related jokes, funny off topics and mostly, me claiming to be innocent and shy.

I wonder why no one believes me. Still, it's been funny. I love intelligent and sarcastic sense of humour... and people getting my jokes and replying to them fast and sharp. Ah, wish I had more of those chats, it's not the same with girls, there's a sexy content about it with hot guys xD

I went shopping with my mum today. Bought some killer clothes. Gosh, I can't wait to wear them! I look so, so, so good in them! -I spent the money I was gonna use for my mp3 player (mine is agonizing) and now I'll have to take the money from the bank so I can pay up to USE =____= Mum didn't want me to buy all what I bought, she said and I quote: "you won't be able to wear that thing in the snow", I replied: "I will. I might freeze to death, but I'll be found dead as a gorgeous, hot and well dressed girl".

Ah, shit, I was just gonna post I was tired and now I got all side tracked. I'm still daydreaming about the chat I had, my mind going crazy with sex-related things xD Ah, life is so good and so promising. I love it ^^

I'm off to work the rest of my group assignment. And then maybe sleep a couple of hours while I wait for the renders to be done. I'll send you some snapshots. It's looking goooood ^^

-Seika.

God loves me!

He really, really does. He wants me to be all happy... and he loves me.

And I love him back!

... This makes me sound like one of those crazy religious people knowcking on your door. Still, I'm sure God would love me to share it with the world, since he'd like to get more believers (it's God, that's his reason to be, be believed in ^^U)

Still sleep-deprived (slept 4 hours though). And pretty much wanting to be annoyed at my classmates -I'm so tired I dn't even have the will to hate them. Ah, I'm gonna give them this one. And the rest of day's ones too.

God loves me, and that's all in need in the world ♥

I'm sorry, Seika is going mad, from 10 years of hard agnostic to fundamentalist believer... Hm.

I'm so sleepy I can't even keep my thought in order. I've been disconnected even though I want to keep on working.

I've spent the whole night awake in the university. I could summarize what I've been doing the whole night, what has happened, but, to the thought of it, I can't feel anything.

I try to, I try to smile as I remember the facebook rant or the fiction reading. I can picture myself eating cookies.

Nothing really moves me inside. It's like I'm a zombi. That's what working nights does to me. And I hate it. It seems it's been so long since I last talked to anyone over the internet although I know just three hours ago I was gossiping with a friend.

This is endless.

I can't even feel moody. I wanna go sleep. I need to go and sleep. I need my bed. I to cool down my mind and think about everything that has happened. I know I feel happy, I know some things have made my night. Right now, everything is... disconnected. Like, as if it was in layers. I'm in a different layer from everything else. And I don't care.

**EDIT: Deleted**

I'm cold.

I lost the track of my thoughts again. And I need to finish another part for this fucking essay.

Plastic whale + over enthusiastic character for my workshop ad. Concept is: "take real holidays", he's riding the whale in the middle of his dinning room ^^U --> Idea developed by CulturalFriend1 + CoolturalFriend2 + me + Absolut Mango Vodka.

Disclaimer: Andy (the character) doesn't belong to me but to the original author. I did the whale model (and the snorkel), the eye I found in google. LAN is an airplane company, it was chilean, now it's latinamerican. And damned good it is. Leyenda/VFX is the visual effects company my teacher works at. Damned good too.

Sometimes, one has to take action.

I've decided I'm not gonna be the one to stop me from doing what would make me happy.

It's not gonna be me, might be my dad, my mum, the university people (though I doubt it) or the US embassy. But not me.

I'm gonna try. And then I will see what happens.

***

A veces, uno tiene que actuar.

He decidido que no voy a ser yo la que me impida hacer algo que me puede hacer feliz.

No voy a ser yo, puede ser mi papá, mi mamá, la gente de la universidad (aunque lo dudo) o la embajada de USA. Pero no yo.

Voy a tratar. Y entonces vamos a ver qué sucede.

I wanna go back, I wanna go back, I wanna go back.

... But I can't. Reason 1: wanna do my thesis with Cultural Friend1 next year. Reason 2: captain_muchiko is coming over in January.

I could send my thesis to hell -my dad would aprove, that's the most important thing-, but I want to show captain_muchiko around .____. ¿Por qué tienes que venir en enero, por qué? ¿Por qué no podías venir en noviembre? ._____.

It's actually killing me. I wanna go back, I wanna go back. I wanna go fucking back.

... And I know I said these kind of things you only do once and blah-blah. I wanna go back. I don't care. I don't care if there's not gonna be a HotSouthAfricanGuy or Ski Patrol Superstar, or cute kid from the race team. -Although they would actually improve the experience, not arguments there, hahaha.

I wanna go back and be there again.

I wanna ski for free. I want to be a lifty again, I loved the people, I loved the place, I loved the job. It was simple, it was easy going... Fucking SkiInstructor. Vermont was a little piece of Heaven.

That's the reason I hate travelling. 'Cause I love it so much I get addicted to it.

Ah. Ah.

-Seika.

Or Headphones, or whatever.

I bought these cool earphones back in the US. I loved them, they are Sony -yeah, I love Sony thingies, Day would have been a Vaio if I didn't like Dell more for computers-, they go in your ear and you can hear the music in different parts of your head. They are the coolest things ever.

They costed 22U$, rather expensive, I think, but quality pays for itself.

I bought my first pair and three days later I had to buy another one 'cause I got them stuck with the door and one of the earphones was ripped off -yeah, sad thing, should take better care of my belongings, but I was used to the kind of headphones that go behind your neck and stay hanging on your shoulders when you're not using them.

I bought the seconds one. I wanted to buy a third one to have for the future... but 22U$ seemed enough money as to make them last for, at least, a year... I think that's life expectancy for earphones, that's what they have usually worked for me anyways.

-Come to think of it, the other time I bought expensive Sony headphones they lasted 3 months. Except the ones I bought in the UK. God Save The Queen and Sony Earphones.

Yersterday, out of the blue, one of my earphones stopped working -I thought they were gonna last for more than 5 months! I mean, I listen to a lot of music while traveling and all that, but, you know, still. I paid fucking 22U$ for those little shits and, even though you don't do a goddamened thing with 22U$ back in the US, it's still money. Those earphones costed 3 hours of my ass getting freezed out there in the snow.

I can't live without proper working music. I tried my old earphones, the ones I said sounded "like a dream"... they are shit compared to the broken ones -even broken they are better. And they have volume control in the wire! .____.

Did some online shopping a few minutes ago, as soon as I got to the university, and---
 

To be continued: I'm the teacher assistant and today is my student's final. And it seems they need me. ^^U

**EDIT: Deleted paragraph**

Pero supongo que todo lo que está en mi cabeza me iba a dejar peor a mí que a ellos, porque ellos no tienen la culpa de ser lo flaites que son. Así que, finalmente, creo que sólo me voy a ir a duchar.

-Seika.

1.- Ski season started on monday... And I can't go skiing just yet! -_____-

2.- This is the only country I've ever been to that is colder indoors during winter and warmer indoors during summer. And I hate it.

3.- I still hate my classmates. Bunch of hypocrites.

It's been a long time since I last saw the show. I don't like it anymore.

But, you know, I'd go back just to see Green Arrow.

He's so fucking hot! Just what I could use in my life.

Hot + wealthy + well educated.

Oh gosh.

1.- ¿Cuántos fideos de resortito tamaño natural caben en una cuchara de té y pueden ser trasladados de una olla a un plato sin que su integridad corra peligro (conocido también como: caerse al piso y recoger los gérmenes allí habitantes)?

Respuesta: Tres. El cuarto invariablemente cae al piso y recoge los gérmenes allí habitantes.

2.- ¿Cómo saber cuando las salchichas están listas?

Respuesta: No se sabe. Las dejas ahí un tiempo determinado (lo que uno se demora en escuchar un par de canciones o lo que te demoras en escribir un post de dos preguntas y dos respuestas) y cuando regresas las sacas, las cortas y te las comes. Si luego de otro tiempo determinado tienes que correr al baño y quedarte allí haciéndole compañía al WC sabrás que o tenías que escuchar otra canción o escribir otra pregunta.

I hear the telephone, I'm getting of the shower and I think is my dad calling me again, after I told him I was gonna take a shower. It pissed me off to no account run to the phone in the first floor, half naked and freezing my ass off.

ME: Hello?
TELEPHONE GUY: *To someone else* Blah-blah-blah.
ME: Hello?
TELEPHONE GUY: ...
ME: Who are you?
TELEPHONE GUY: Hello?
ME: *Sharply* What do you want?
TELEPHONE GUY: Hello?
ME: Why are you calling and what do you want?
TELEPHONE GUY: *Genuinely surprised* Why are you talking at me like that?
ME: *Trying to calm down -it was somewhat rude of me to talk like that* I'm sorry, what is it?
TELEPHONE GUY: Firstly, good morning, miss. My name is John Smith, I'm calling from Falabella 'cause your account won--
ME: I don't have a Falabella account.
TELEPHONE GUY: Sorry?
ME: *Sharply again* I don't have a Falabella account.
TELEPHONE GUY: Why are you talking at me like that, miss?
ME: *Not as pissed off as I should have been* I'm busy, okay, I'm doing things and you keep nagging me without telling me what you want and--
TELEPHONE GUY: Are you fucking, you little ass-shit cunt? *Or something like that, his words were in spanish, and that's not the literal translation, but that sounds clouse enough in the offensiveness of it*
ME: ... *hang up*

( My thoughts afterwards )

Let him call again! That-s how pissed off I am. -Although I know it wouldn't do any good but get me even more on my nerves.

I want my dad to pick me up so I can tell him and my bro about this... they are probably gonna laugh ^^U And I will too, it's funny, gotta give it that xD

-Seika.