December 10th seikita's -that's me talking in 3rd person, thank you- travelling to New York City and then to Vermont, USA.

She's gonna be there until April -more or less-. Working, if you really need to know. And, no, not in animations like anyone would expect, she's gonna be working in a ski resort -'cause she loves the snow, and skiing, and the Simple Life.

She's gonna have DAY -that's the netbook, for God's sake- with her, and probably internet, so you can expect news + pictures here and in Facebook ocassionally. -Knowing me, there're probably gonna be lots of updates, I just can't help myself sharing my happiness + love + news with you all ^___^ And the funny stories too.

If you're a penpal and you're reading this: seikita is not taking any new penpals for now -she hasn't been taking penpals for a while now, really, but you never know who might just ask-; and she's gonna be on penpal-hold too. -Unless I expressely wrote you otherwise, then you can complain to me. There's just so many letters I can take xD And those are like... 3-4, tops.

Then, I hope my flist understands I might not be able to read all their entries and comment on them -comments are love, I know ♥ But, again, time is more love ♥

"Have a safe trip, seikita and have lots of fun ^^ -And we all wish you a HotSouthAfricanGuy for you to have fun and stay warm" -Thank you. ^^

-Seika.

PS: sticky post, updates will go below this. *** Las actualizaciones van a ir debajo de este post.

30 Seconds to Mars last album is ORGASMIC. Jared's voice is so...

... ohmygog.

( Rambilng about my story with 30STM and Jared Leto and... well... rambling ^^U )

-Seika.

I was working. I was supposed to finish two sequences, I did three. Still have some work to do.

Took a break.

Strawberries, vodka, triplesec, icecubes, some sugar and a glass.

Cosmopolitan.

What is there not to love about the Simple Life?


-Seika.

And ten days to New York City. ^o^

After a moment of conscious thought while I was heading to the bathroom, and after all that has happened here...

... I've had three experiences with tarot reading in my life; 1.- when I went to a fortune teller myself -mostly driven by my former best friend. 2.- when my mother told me what a fortune teller had told her about me and 3.- what I heard from my stepmother.

I've come to two conclusions: 1.- fortune-tellers will tell highly disturbed people what they what to hear. Even if that's not the true, so it's rather pointless paying to tell you your thoughts back. -On their defense, CoolturalFriend2 says that was a sucky one and the good ones aren't quite like it. Don't care, I'm not gonna pay first and find out later.

2.- Tarot cards don't fancy me. I say this 'cause out of the three experiences related above, I always get the crappy + dark reading. Fortune-tellers will always say I'm gloomy, dark, depressive and highly unhappy. Among with the funny comments and warnings that say I should stop hanging out with goth people. -For the record, I don't know any goth.

Well, I beg to disagee. I wonder that the hell do tarot cards have against me. Maybe I'm missing something here -well, clearly, I'm missing the part that I'm unhappy and suicidal. Bah, like I care to find it... Maybe there's the dark + gloomy part, I just release it through Diek, Row, and whomever comes my way. I'm a mentally healthy person with a slight OCD and God Complex xD -Can't blame me, it sounds way too sane for me, considering xD

-Seika.

I was doing some research on Row and dysfunctional relationships. -Sometimes I think I'm working in the wrog field, for a life, I don't really do research on that, but on little things that'd help character developement and plotting. I've learnt a bunch of things. This part I found interesting.


Codependent Relationships Dynamics part 2 - Dysfunctional Definition of Love

"As long as we believe that someone else has the power to make us happy then we are setting ourselves up to be victims"

One of the biggest problems with relationships in this society is that the context we approach them from is too small. We were taught that getting the relationship is the goal.

( ++ )

There is no goal to reach that will bring us to happily-ever after. We are not incomplete until we find our soul mate. We are not halves that cannot be whole without a relationship.

True Love is not a painful obsession. It is not taking a hostage or being a hostage. It is not all-consuming, isolating, or constricting. Believing we can't be whole or happy without a relationship is unhealthy and leads us to accept deprivation and abuse, and to engage in manipulation, dishonesty, and power struggles. The type of love we learned about growing up is an addiction, a form of toxic love.

( ++ )

There is nothing wrong with wanting a relationship - it is natural and healthy. There is nothing wrong with wanting a relationship that will last forever - expecting it to last forever is what is dysfunctional. Expectations set us up to be a victim - and cause to abandon ourselves in search of our goal.

If we can start seeing relationships not as the goal but as opportunities for growth then we can start having more functional relationships. A relationship that ends is not a failure or a punishment - it is a lesson.
As long as our definition of a successful relationship is one that lasts forever - we are set up to fail. As long as we believe that we have to have the other in our life to be happy, we are really just an addict trying to protect our supply - using another person as our drug of choice. That is not True Love - nor is it Loving.

1.- Internet at home is dead. It's been dead for 3 days already, and when I called the company, they had a recorded message that said there was an "incident" in my area, now they stop playing the message, they won't fucking answer my phone.

2.- I'm hungry. Diet was fine until my mum left a cake for my brother's birthday in my flat. What happened? I ate half of the thing and proved myself I can't be trusted with cakes.

3.- Seems my dad and his wife are breaking up -what a news, actually, same thing every year and the bitch jost won't leave 'cause she's much interested in money and social status -both of which my dad gladly provides-. I just wished she'd stopo being such a cunt and make up her mind or not, it's either staying or leaving, but stop playing fucking victim.

4.- Things for my trip to the US are all set now. I still need to buy like two things and get some student ID cards for my bro and I. Today I gotta pick up my passport with my VISA. My bro is also coming with me, we have the plane tickets and everything ^^ It's gonna be so fun! I'm so excited about it already ^o^ -Sólo espero que no haya ningún indeseable que quiera molestarme con pendejadas. Sí, eso va para ti, Ski Patrol, dejando mensajes anónimos como un pendejo. Pendejo.

5.- I finished my internship almost a month ago. But I've been called in as a freelance -which makes me so happy- for quite a few days, a good thing, indeed, 'cause that money is gonna be invested -very much probably- in Row -the BJD- and then I get to work and keep me busy. -I do hate working, I think, I'd like to procrastinate, but when I least imagine it, I realize I'm doing 39876295+ things and the time and it's stressful and fun and it feels like I'm doing something out of my life -and then I can't really complain about it.

6.- I'm somewhat sleep deprived, I stayed up till 5 am last night doing a stop motion animation -"Nightmare before Xmas" kinda animation about a cat in a bathroom doing cat thing. It's fun so far, we're almost done with it -it had me worried.

7.- I'm going to a The Killers live concert on Sunday! Yay! ^o^ And I'm gonna go watch "New Moon" on monday -shame on me, I know, I gfeel bad for it, but what can I do; I'm weak .___.

8.- Sweet penfriend-Ann worte about a show called "Being human" in her LJ. About a vampire, werewolf and a ghost trying to live like normal people. I downloaded it and it's been so great so far! I really love it! -The vampire's somewhat a good lore -not the teenager kind of vampire, thank God- and the werewolf only turns during full moons, which is good. The gghost is kind of a turn down since she don't walk through things and the only really ghost thing she does is stay in the house and is-not-seeing-by-normal-people. So far, the show is a win, can't wait for the second season.

9.- I finished watching Season 2 of "Skins". I don't know if I wanna keep watching the 3rd season... I really-really liked the main character from the first 2 seasons and now he won't be in the cast -90% of the cast was changed since the story pretty much changed too.

10.- CulturalFriend1 is out of class. That was what i was waiting for. Still, new-productive life I've been having, considering. =P

-Seika

It's been a while since I have posted a proper picture. It's not that much that I haven't taken any, but I really didn't feel like sharing.

Although, a few weekends ago we went to Sewell with my mum and bro; it's an abandoned mining town that used to have 200.000 inhabitants. Now it's just a gohst town. It's be cool to visit it there more often, but it's in the mining grounds and the copper company won't let civilians go in unless with a certified tour. It's rather expensive.

So we went there, in the middle of the Andes mountains, like... 2 and a half hours from Santiago -1 and a half hour from my mum's. It was good fun, my brother and I separated -even though we were shown a 2 hours video that clearly said "don't separate from the tour guide"- from the group and broke in into a few houses. I have a thing for abandoned places, you can imagen how thrilled I was. My bro wanted to explore everything.

We got lost, got the group back, got some wicked videos and some cool photos. I loved most of them. My bro has to masterize the art of opening locks though, instead of just practicing in situ. -Maybe I could get him for his bday -tomorrow- a proper "how to open locks" kit. Hehehe.

I'm gonna get a BJD ♫ -I still don't know how much I'm gonna get paid, but it doesn't matter, I want it. Knowing that makes me at ease with myself. Now, let's hope Row doesn't sell out o-o

*So excited* I even had a dream about it ^o^

I'm gonna have a Row ♫

And then octopusvulgarissurprises me with those (this one + this one) kickass Diek drawings; life couldn't be better ♫

Now, off to work 'cause I stayed up late last night and today over-slept and now I'm insanely late >_<... And then I say I deserve the Row, gosh xD

-Seika.
Later today I'm gonna post a pic of the Row I want ^^ -Hihihihi.

( **EDIT: Endless rambling about BJDs + Row + Crap --> Feeling chatty.** )

... Or something like New Year Resolution.

My last freelance paycheck I got from the place I did my internship at -I'm actually gonna get it, hopefully by the end of the month- was for 400U$ I'm working as a freelance again, same place; and if I get something close to 400U$ again, I'm gonna spend that money on this.

That guy is gonna be Row -brunette, not blonde. Same make-up since I'm not willing to try doing it myself. Darker wig, like chocolate-brown. Hazel eyes. Stylish clothes -probably just gonna buy a pair of jeans, shoes and that, I've got a friend who has offered to sew clothes for him.

And I'm gonna be as happy as fuck.

I've been saving for a while now, you see, I deserve a reward for being such a good girl.

I've decided. -If, by the time I get to the US and get myself a credit card, the doll has sold out and I can't find another one Row-looking like, I won't buy it. It'd mean that's God.

Gosh, I'm lacking focus here. But this is as enthrilling as sex. Oh, my.

... I wonder why not Diek, really xD Maybe 'cause he's so clear in my mind I know I'm not gonna find anyone like him. And, well, Row's... Row's... Row's my current fucking obsession. That's how it is. And I'm fucking insane. And insanity is under-rated happiness ^^

-Seika.

If Row had a daughter, she'd be called Gemini.

She'd be beautiful. She'd be talented. Row would adore her. He'd teach her everything he knows, he'd probably spoil her.

Gemini Varjoyansk.

I like it.

... Unfortunately, Row won't have a daughter. He won't have children and he won't be a parent. For one, he doesn't like women. Secondly, he dies young. He gets killed.

Maybe in another universe there's a Gemini, maybe in another universe Row doesn't die. Maybe, in that same place, Gabriel will never break up with him...

... And, then, there won't be any Diek.

That'd be a sad universe.

-Seika.

... I've been doing some BJDoll shopping, I think I found a pretty acceptable Row. 600U$. Would that be too much? I wonder.

"Dick for the reader."

"Dick for who reads."

"Pico pal que lo lee".

Having fun at the office with my boss + coworkers.

Diviertiéndome en la oficina con mi jefe y colegas.

Protozoo.




.

I was looking for someone in my phone directory. Found this. OMG, me is so sick. Oh, so sick. -Wonder who I'd be calling through that number.

***

Estaba  mirando en mi agenda telefonica. Encontre esto. OMG, mi estar muy enferma. Oh, muy enferma. -Me pregunto a donde estare llamando con ese numero.

-Seika.

So, being my mum the doctor she is -notice the irony, she's an accountant-, is recommending this diet to all her friends; and she tells them what to eat and what not and checks on them to see if they are following the diet or not.

**Insert** I've always gt like an average weight, give or take 2-3 kgs; when I went to the US lost like 6 -and I would have probably done better if I didn't drink the smirnoff ice a day and the chili french fries with friends, but losing weight wasn't the idea, it was just a plus. Wonder why, my guess was cold + ski + sex with HotSouthAfricanGuy, but that's just my guess. 

The thing is, I bought tonz of clothes in NYC, then I came back to Chile, started doing spinning, had to quit 'cause I hurt my knee, for about 4-5 months. Went back, but was too lazy to do so and quit again. Got the internship and when I was getting back on my spinning track, job started to become a bitch and people started to worry about summer so the gym was full + I was 80% of the time late.

Quit again. Result: I got like 4 kg back -or something like it, I don't even want to get near a scale-; I just notice it 'cause my cool NYC clothes seem smaller -and I don't think all of them are actually getting smaller at the same time, come on-; so, now I'm, done with the job, I got my mum's diet, went back to spinning and I'm dying to get something sugary in me; and it's like, the third day I'm, doing this thing ^^U **End Insert**

So, I have asked my mum what I can eat and what not, mostly because she told me what to eat, but didn't send the actual diet by mail till now.

I was at this party, there was a huge chocolate cake my bro was eating, he offered me and I was like "noooo, I can't, you know, I'm doing this diet 'cause I wanna look cool in my NYC clothes in NYC", but he insisted. And the cake was there and it was calling me and I was dying to get something sweet and stop tasting cheese -I love cheese and I never eat cheese 'cause, well, you know how many kcals does cheese have? I don't, but I assume they are a lot. Cheese's allowed-. So, I said something like "well, ywe're gonna ask mum if cake's allowed". Myu bro agreed, and then I jumped to the cake and started eating it.

It was chocolate; I die for chocolate cakes, seriously.

My brother looked at me and all I said was "I'm gonna ask mum as soon as I get up and stop dreaming, for now, I'm gonna fucking enjoy this". I ate it all.

It's like coca-cola addiction all over again. I'm withdrawal -and I figure it's just 'cause I know I can't eat sugar; psychological, really-. At least I knew it was a dream and didn't panic about it. I did panic once with the coke; it tasted so, so freaking good... and I felt so insanely guilty afterwards xD -I'm such a masochist.

-Seika.

PS: Gotta call my mum yet to ask her about the chocolate cake and tell her I ate it all ^^U

"Skins" is total and absolute love ♥ And I love Tony -the guy who looks like Row. He's genius... And has something like HotSouthAfricanGuy, come to think about it... Interesting things, TV provides...

-Seika.

Anyone out there has a paypal account and would like to donate me 12U$ before friday? Pretty please?

I can give them back in december-january when I get paypal myself, if you really need that.

I want to buy a comic book and the orders are due this saturday. And I really-really want it. Pretty please? *.*

-Seika.

**EDIT** GOT THE PAYPAL ACCOUNT FROM A COWORKER *jumps around excited* AWW **END EDIT**